Strongly Disillusioned

I have had the most distressing day for quite some time. I have been personally violated in broad daylight on my front porch. Now I always thought that I lived in a nice quiet SAFE neighbourhood. I have lived here all my 35 years and often don't lock my doors or bolt the windows or even lock my car. I thought I was safe but apparently I was dead wrong. Let me fill you in.

I arrived home from work at 5pm. Came in to the house, fed the dog, petted the kitty and then left again with the dog to go right around the corner to my parent's house (a 1 minute walk) to pick up my tax return. I decided to stay for a short bit to talk to my dad about work, life, what not (I know life is not what not blah blah blah). I was leaving and home again before 6pm. That is when it happened. I got up onto my porch and went to pick up my blue box to take it to the curb as tomorrow is garbage day. It was missing. NO not my blue box but my shovel that I had placed in my blue box to keep it from blowing away in the strong winds. It was there when I left to go to my parents because I made a mental note to myself "self, I said, put your shovel in the garage when you get home". I reached out but no shovel handle was there to grab. I mean someone came up to my front door and actually took my shovel. Who the hell does that? Really, I want to know. Who dares to take someone's shovel off their front porch in broad daylight and in the middle of APRIL. What am I going to do now if we do get that freak snowstorm? I mean we do live in Canada...it does snow here. I won't be able to go anywhere, I can't shovel my way out - the ass who took my shovel saw to that. I will be house bound and probably die of starvation all because some jerk stole my shovel. It was a good shovel too - ergonomic handle, reinforced scoop and blade and most of all a gift from my daddy. Now its gone, gone for good. I am pissed and if I ever find out who took my shovel they had better run for the hills cause I will call in the army, navy and if necessary, the marines too cause no one has the right to steal my shovel! Do people forget that I am trained in use of force takedowns? I can f*#k you up people. Now I need to go and try and find my house keys so I can start to lock the place up. Its not a safe world anymore so watch your backs - your shovel may be the next target.